In Honor of Jihad Muhammad

In Honor of Jihad Muhammad




In his memory

I will stay calm today

I will carry his fire for freedom

But I will stay in control



In his memory

I will look for paths of resolution

I will continue the struggle

And I will look for ways to come together

Before I separate only to regroup again



In his memory

I will think community first

I will continue to build my self intellectually

I will grow my wealth individually

And I will share in abundance my resources



In his memory I will not forget my mortality

I will undersatnd Who is the Greatest

I will submit to this Universality

And I will share my Deen through my actions



In his memory

I will not forget form whince I came

I will not turn away from Mid-Town

I will always think Urban Community Economic Development



His name will ring commitment to our People

Full of admiration and respect for his heart and his works...



In his memory...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iW5EwfyVnOw&feature=youtube_gdata_player

All Things Are Conditional

When you have expectations of anyone outside of yourself
You are setting yourself up for disappointment
I try not to ever have expectations
But people ask me to trust them
I think they ask me to trust them to see if I will only
They definitely have their interests in mind
Which is not a bad thing
Its just not an honest thing
The reasons behind anything that they say to me is the conditions
I love you if you do this...
I love you if you do that...
I mean this to you if you do this...
I meant this to you if you do that...
I am secure enough in myself to not need conditions
I don't need you to be a certain way to me for me to be a certain way to you
I know all things are conditional outside of your children
So I don't place people in situations where they have to feel uncomfortable
I'm not closing my eyes while I am intimate to not fall deeper into anything
I'm not playing games with my space and or feelings
I'm not into saying I can help you, but under these conditions
I don't do that because I represent myself and my children
I already have disappointed them enough in the past
When will I take responsibility and do what is best for them?
When will I take responsibility and do what's best for me
My life is ending
Their life is beginning
I am their hero until they can evaluate me amongst their other heroes
In a while I may not fly so high
My cape may not be so brilliant
My strength will definitely diminish
And my all knowing brian will pale inside of the new world they will discover
I love them
And I need to remember how to truly love myself
All things being conditional....

Elle Est Belle (pronounced El - Ay - Bell)

Elle est belle 

And so many times I have never told her

I have passed her in streets congested with ugliness and she has renewed my spirit

I have seen her in her present condition and thought about how I may have contributed to her pain

See I have learned from other males and it's not surprising that "il" is the noun for male in french

We do sick things at times to ourselves so others don't have a chance

Yet, elle est belle

I'm not in euphoria either or speaking of any of the negative attributes of her

I am focusing on that part of her that is bigger than my primal instinct to return to Eve

Bigger than my desire to fill her and feel her as I attempt to change our future

I mean have you really seen elle as she is just being her

The perk in her step as she remembers something else that she needs to do

Her internal laugh as she remembers something that she enjoyed that was done to her

I try to stay valued in both categories

Not judging my worth by her

But showing the worth of her to me

It's easy to be vulgar

The art is in the sensuality

Elle has a tenderness that can be given in reward for her respect

Elle, tu me manque (I miss you)

Le dernier fois que je te voir (The last time I saw you)

Je te l"avais dit... (I told you)

Ni mois sauf toi (Not me without you)

Ni toi sauf moi (Or you without me)

And I meant it

I was you before I became me and I carry your "x"

"Y" makes me who I am but I still understand the compassion needed to care

You keep me there...

The problem with most of my peers words to your ears is the same problem I have with them

We don't believe them...

There has been a lost integrity behind saying what we mean

And meaning what we say

The true value of us is how everyone else feels when we are taken away

My memories of being held by you have always carried me through

So in some sort of way I want you to feel held by me

In all of my actions 

In all of my art

Elle est belle is an essential part

She is beautiful

And her inner most beauty is what drives me to her all the time

I try to complement her scars because they give her skin character

Even though she  has been taught that covering them up makes her belle

I often let her walk by when she is made up for the show

I've been hugged and got some of that on my skin

It was hot and my pores could not breathe

And if this makes her feel good then I accept it

I just don't think she believes me when I tell her that its not my preference

I like her scratches and nicks, they tell her story

I'm not talking about in marketing and promotion because we all know that that is for perfection

And this is an imperfect world 

So I hope that we all know that that is not real or attainable

Its for money

And so many do anything for money

And this is exactly where they lower their value

Il et elle (him and her)

They say all money spends the same

That has not been my experience

They say all sex is the same

That has not been my experience either

They say all men are the same

I hope this is not true

They say all women are the same

Now I know I can stop this with you

The truth is that you have the potential to start and or stop a war

Speak to the core of all of our pain if you speak to us and not at us

The maternal has an order we have not followed for so long in public

Privately wishing things could change

But not exerting our strengths to manifest what our hearts have called for

A return to the respect for elle

Then our speech in public will be tempered by appropriate dialog for our daughters

Our appearance would be palatable to all our children

And the elders would rejoice and enthusiastically give us permission to speak

And the sounds wouldn't be so weak

And everyone could tell

Elle est belle

I Fly 4 Life

I Fly 4 Life

I Fly 4 Life

I fly for the opportunity to live

I soar high above the earth on hope

I also understand what it feels like

To be tired

To be confused

To want to give up

But I don’t

I don’t ever give up

I found out that my smile

My smile soothes the spirit

It is received through the eyes

And goes right to the heart

I cry too

I Fly because of how I cry

Not why

I just fill up with so much

That it just leaks out

And it’s ok

I’m not the 1^st

And I won’t be the last to cry

And I am aware that others care

People that don’t even know me feel for me

Not so strange strangers

Want to know

Where I get the strength

See, I stretch out my arms

Even if it’s when I close my eyes

And I float high above this earth

I head for the stars

I see above the clouds

I look at the sun

And I fell its heat on my face

And I remember

I Fly 4 Life

I fly to live

I fly for love

And my life makes me give

Over and over and over and over and over

Again

So you too may live…

I fly 4 Life

I fly forever

We fly together…

Communicate With The Dead

Communicate With The Dead Blackexperimentalism - The Movement
http://soundcloud.com/kelechukwu-brnfre/communicate-with-the-dead

I Must Still Have Some Worth

I don't mind when she lays on my shoulder and speaks to me about myself and my behavior

When she tells me of how my actions have hurt us and our future

I have learned to not negate what she says because i don't believe it

because if she is saying that she feels this then this is her truth

I don't mind when she raises her voice about issues that are serious for her

Even when i think she is over-exaggerating and being too extreme

I try to always reflect later on what took past between us to try and better address the situation

On the outside people would marginalize this to love

I feel that respect is greater than love because people hit the children they love

Grab the spouse they love and neglect them as a punishment

People don't speak to people they love for years over small things

But people always give people they respect room to grow

The benefit of doubt and the room to change for the better

I respect her mind so I listen to her thoughts

I respect her decisions so I try to partner mine with hers

When she is done talking and I have listened intently

I find that I am better because of the time I have taken

I learned more about myself by listen to the perception of me from someone I respect

Someone that I don't limit to love

Someone that stretches my boundaries to be greater

If I am angry about anything it is that I never got it before

I don't romanticize any past relationship errors that could be corrected

I appreciate this moment in time of my life

Everything changes

But every change does not make you better

More prepared for the fact that at some period and time in your life

You have more past and less future to look forward to having

So you have to enjoy her softness and character

And her character has to be what you live for as time and gravity weighs in

And understand that I an a handful

But I have a life of living to give

And if she wants to share it with me

Then I must still have some worth...

Umbilical

In a time when creativity and original ideas seem to be limited

Where loyalty has taken an all time low

Where you really have to be careful of whom you consider friends

And really evaluate those you feel are enemies

All experiences teach you lessons

What you retain has to make you better when you see this again

Pretend you share the same placenta as a thinker

That you evaluate yourself and your energies and what surrounds you

That you can explain all of your actions and reasons for all the things that you do

Pretend that you are deliberate with your speech

And that you think before you speak

And that you understand the repercussions of erroneous words

That you understand what is said and what is not said

And that you evaluate actions so a lot does not need be said

Pretend that in this placenta you feel the emotions of creator

And you have that burst of energy that pushes you past stale environments

Makes you seek the positive in the situation

And to give yourself encouragements because very few give you genuine feedback

Pretend all of the women that you have dealt with understand that if its over you can still speak

Their emotions don't have to overbear their sensibility to be around you

That they should see that you have accepted rejection before

And that rejection is not death to anything but rather life to new realities

Pretend you are a man and you have to let go of childish things

Move into more secured areas that allow your children to feel safe

Understand the the transition from boy to man is an unclear line with no time attached

Know that anger and hate don't qualify as justifications for violence

And that there is nothing as strong as gentleness

And nothing is as gentle as real strength

And you do not have to be a pacifist to not like war

Now get back into your own reality

And you can see why I keep cutting the umbilical

Then We repent

My fast growing desire to be inside of my head to stay warm inside of heated thoughts of passion

The depths of the ending that never comes as many times as she sounds off into the universe for freedom

Her electricity powers my need to keep her captivated by the intensity of my interest and I turn black

I don't get green with envy, I stay black because I am the presence of every color and emotion

My inner being is deep enough to drown in and stay calm because you know some air will rise

Like I have for so many moons and so may suns that have rose and set in the horizon of us

I really am not ashamed of my lust for you and the strength in my arms contract like a boa around you

We suffocate because our kisses press our face and bodies close so we sweat and enter each other

Pourous is our love and we slowly seep into the unconsciousness and rest and peace of sleep and dance in each others dreams

Day dreams just as strong so I forget that I hate to leave the bed we share to go gather means to buy more tributes to my adoration of our images

I have to make room for more mirrors on our walls to catch us at more angles as we bathe in each others scent

Then we repent...

I Love Them Both

My mind plays tricks on me

When I think I need to give up it pushes me on

When I think I have done all I can do

It lets me know I still have more in me

It helps me to ignore the maliciousness of those closest to me

The jealousy and envy they hold

When I feel I still have nothing

Slipping between the seconds as they get closer to infinity

I stand on small stones of resiliency

Holding the small ground I raised my expectations on as my island

Staying afloat to look like a mirage

Drink of this potion and intoxicate your life with my spirits

Hallucinations make people think they are perfect

Perfection is the final stages of life when there is no living left to do

It rests in smiles of children that really only love

Rarely know hate except in words repeated from adults they believe in

My mind plays tricks on me

Telling me I can no longer believe in men

I have to loose the "n" and only believe in me

Superficial is the love of a person that is still angry and won't forgive you

Won't ever let you grow from your old self and skin already shedded

Heading for a finite position

I now understand

That my mind is my best friend

I need to embrace her willingness to love me

Intermingle her sound judgement and fidelity

And weigh it against my self

For he still is basking in arrogance

And afraid to ask for direction

I am more akin to him than my mind

So presently

I still am lost

But one day I will listen to her and find my way

I love them both as I love myself

ged Selectively If we only could stay true to our commitments We would receive what we deserve Ultimately

oose to argue Why is it so hard to just live with This is just what this is... Its not for the kids Selfish does what selfish is What is sacred has chan

Half my day gone waiting on an I love you Half the time thinking maybe I should just tell you All the time that is said to be love Wasted because they ch